Dear Fake Dr. Tommy:

Last weekend, I went to a bar and consumed many adult beverages and got really drunk. The next thing I knew, I was hugging the porcelain God praying that I would be able to stop puking out my brains.

This morning I feel as though I'm going to die and the room won't stop spinning. Can you please give me advice on how to cure the hangover from hell?

Yours truly.
From Anonymous

Fake Dr. Tommy replied:

Anonymous, the first step in overcoming alcoholism is looking into an organization who remarkably has your name, Alcoholics Anonymous. Second, you may want to examine the grammar and/or syntax you used in your question. I think you meant to say "hugging the toilet and praying to the porcelain God", but we're not here to be 10th grade English teachers. Plus, I suspect you may have been intoxicated when you wrote me for advice, so I'll cut you some slack.

Overcoming an acute case of ethanol intoxication can be very difficult. Two of the main causes of hangovers are dehydration and electrolyte imbalance (which really are one in the same). For one who has a presentation including a night of vomiting, the major concern is electrolyte imbalance. Electrolytes are those molecules about which Gatorade is always talking. Unfortunately, you vomited all of yours up which can make you feel sick. So I would start by drinking a bottle or two of Gatorade. For those of you who aren't quite as sick, you get hung-over because you are dehydrated. Alcohol blocks anti-diuretic hormone (ADH), which causes you to pee a lot when you're drinking. This dehydrates the body and causes an electrolyte imbalance. After a night of drinking, I would advise always drinking a tall glass of water before you go to bed, and when you wake up the next morning you will probably be hangover free.

If these remedies don't totally cure the hangover, there are a few ancillary treatments to consider. The first would be to eat something the next morning. Judging from my primary research, eating something substantial (if not made impossible by nausea) helps me to feel better. You could also try a headache medicine like Advil, Tylenol, or Excedrin the next morning. I really wouldn't try it while you're still drunk, because you might just vomit the pills back up.

If any of you have other suggestions or home remedies, I look forward to posting them here on this blog.

I hope that answers your question Anonymous. Good luck in treating your future hangovers. Remember to NEVER operate an automobile or heavy machinery while under the influence of alcohol or drugs. If you ever feel your sickness is beyond home remedy, please call 911.

Dear Fake Dr. Tommy:

Do you believe in flu shots? There are some crazy folk with needles coming to my office building next week and they want me to be voluntarily injected with the flu virus. There's something a little creepy about that.
From Anonymous

Fake Dr. Tommy replied:

Yes, I absolutely believe in flu shots. However the science of flu shots isn't exact. As we all know, there isn't an antibiotic that kills viruses. And it turns out that the flu is a virus. So we are required to use immunizations to try and build up the body's defenses to fight the disease that way. In fact, the flu is many different variations of one virus, which makes things difficult. So a bunch of microbiologists and infectious disease doctors get together each year and attempt to determine which bunch of serotypes or variations will be most prevalent in the population for that particular year. Then they call the flu shot companies with their recommendations, and the flu shots get made. So basically it's a crapshoot, because while the population will be immunized against whichever cocktail of viral variations are in the shot, but if you get infected with a different variation, your body doesn't have immunity. That's why there's a myth that the actual shot can give you the flu, which is malarkey. What probably happens is that someone gets a shot and then by coincidence (see my blog for definition) gets infected with a different variation of the flu virus.

So in summary, I absolutely recommend that you get a flu shot, especially if you are a health care worker, immunocompromised, or are continually exposed to disease (you have kids in daycare). The shot is good for normal folks too.

Dear Fake Dr. Tommy:

I've noticed in your blogs you talking about applying to residency programs in general surgery. Is this true? If so it makes me very happy that you are doing so, because I think you'll be a great, hard-working surgeon. Good luck!
From, Anonymous

Fake Dr. Tommy replied:

Thanks Anonymous for your lovely remarks. I am indeed applying for residency in general surgery. I know it takes a thoughtful, hard-working, and reliable person to be a successful surgeon. I feel that I posses those qualities, and I look forward to learning so much more on my journey to become a surgeon. It certainly is an exciting time in my life.